Playlist: "Thinking of You" Katy Perry

Comparisons are easily done once you've had a taste of perfection
Like an apple hanging from a tree I picked the ripest one
~ I still got the seed ~

You said move on where do I go?
I guess second best is all I will know

Cause when I'm with him I am thinking of you
~ Thinking of you ~
What you would do if you were the one who was spending the night
Oh I wish that I was looking into your eyes

You're like an Indian summer in the middle of winter
~ Like a hard candy with a surprise center ~
How do I get better once I've had the best
You said there's tons of fish in the water
So the waters I will test

He kissed my lips I taste your mouth
He pulled me in I was disgusted with myself

Cause when I'm with him I am thinking of you
Thinking of you
What you would do if you were the one who was spending the night
Oh I wish that I was looking into...

You're the best and yes I do regret
How I could let myself let you go
Now the lesson's learned
~ I touched it I was burned ~
Oh I think you should know

Cause when I'm with him I am thinking of you
Thinking of you
What you would do if you were the one who was spending the night
Oh I wish that I was looking into your eyes

~ Looking into your eyes ~
Looking into your eyes
Oh won't you walk through
And bust in the door and ~ take me away ~
Oh no more mistakes
~ Cause in your eyes I'd like to stay ~
Stay...

---

I used to wonder whether you could openly use this song to represent your feelings. Surely, it'd be too cruel to the poor guy you are now with?

Perhaps, if you don't care enough about what your new beau thinks, then it's problem solved.

The backdrop unchanged

I have recently been reminded of a simple Chinese poem I learnt in my younger days.

---

<<題城都南庄>> 唐 崔護

去年今日此門中
人面桃花相映紅
人面不知何處去
桃花依舊笑春風


---

I don't remember how I was taught to interpret it at the time. But apparently, the poet is deeply saddened that, although the flowers are still in bloom a year later, the lady's face is nowhere to be seen.

Though my Chinese isn't tops, I have developed my own appreciation for this short poem. In fact, I see quite a different attitude coming from this simple verse.

The poet returns to the same place a year later. The lady is gone, yet the flowers are still abloom. To add to the story, the birds still sing, the sun still shines.

In the stage that is life, people come and go. Someone may stumble in unexpectedly, perhaps stay with you for a while, then exit when the time comes. But the backdrop doesn't change. Life goes on.

So the poet wasn't saddened that the lady was no longer there. Rather, I imagine him giving a wistful smile as he gazes at the doorway, happy to see the rosy pink peach blossoms and content that, hereafter, they will remind him of that beautiful lady who once stood under them.

The return of the milkman

A man with a Scottish (?) accent rang our doorbell a few weeks ago, and introduced himself as the new milkman in the area. He took me quite by surprise, because I didn't think milkmen still existed.

Apparently, a company called Aussie Farmers Direct were offering regular delivery services of milk, bread, butter and the like to our area. It all sounded pretty exciting, so I ordered a few things.

It was only after I gave Mr Milkman my credit card details that I realised this could all be a scam. The fact that they had a website made me feel slightly more secure, but I decided to monitor my credit card transactions just in case. Luckily, no shady transactions has appeared on my statement.

And today, I received a confirmation email re my first order, due next Monday. They have a really convenient online change-your-order system. It seems to be a genuine service after all.

Now I just have to wait for my first delivery to come through!

A gift in tatters

The article "Growing Pains" in the October 10 issue of The Economist talked about the issue of teenage pregnancies in America and how the states were trying to prevent them.

In Texas, since the state only requires the schools to emphasise abstinence, 94% of districts did not discuss contraceptive methods. Those that did were often erroneous or misleading.

One way they use to drive the message across is through shaming:

"One district stages a skit about a young couple on their honeymoon. The husband presented his bride with a beautiful wrapped present that he had been saving for years. Her gift for him was in tatters."

This passage really got me thinking about the issue of pre-marital sex. How condemned is it in contemporary society? How important is it to be a virgin till that special day?

I would think that, with so many people in de facto relationships, pre-marital sex is quite common. But given that such a relationship is recognised legally, perhaps it doesn't count as pre-marital sex. Regardless, does its common occurrence make it OK?

Here, as is the case with most things, there isn't a clear defining line separating wrong from right. I don't think the notions of impurity are as prominent nowadays. A girl's sexual history is more a reflection of her attitudes towards sexual relationships.

Context plays an important role. A girl who lost her virginity to a long-term boyfriend would (or, at least, should) be regarded differently to one who has had more sexual partners than she can remember.

And what if the roles were reversed? What if the wife's present was well-preserved, but the husband's was in shreds? I don't think a story like this would have much effect at all.

I'm going to skip the feminist arguments about lack of equality and all that. They're given. Double standards exist. What I'm more interested in is this: What does society expect to happen?

If pre-marital sex is alright for guys, but not for girls, then who are these guys meant to have sex with? Married women? Or perhaps, each other?

Go figure.

The jacaranda timekeeper

As I was walking through the Quad the other day, I stopped to admire our famous jacaranda tree. The purple blossoms created a nice contrast against the brown bricks and the green grass.


I then felt a creative spell, so I sat down in one of the arches and began to write.


An air of serenity hung in the air of this ancient building, and I felt such contentment to just sit there and let my mind wander.

There's an old myth that if you haven't yet began to study before the jacaranda's first bloom, you're going to fail. My Torts lecturer once commented that, due to global warming, the first bloom has occurred earlier and earlier each year.

I sure hope he's right.

Playlist: "Nothing's Gonna Change My Love for You" 方大同

Khalil Fong's version of Glenn Medeiros's song seems quite sufficient to melt anyone's heart.

---

If I had to live my life without you near me
The days would all be empty
The nights would seem so long

With you I see forever oh so clearly
I might have been in love before
~ But it never felt this strong ~

Our dreams are young and we both know
They'll take us where we want to go
Hold me now, touch me now
~ I don't want to live without you ~

Nothing's gonna change my love for you
You ought to know by now how much I love you
One thing you can be sure of
~ I'll never ask for more than your love ~

Nothing's gonna change my love for you
You ought to know by now how much I love you
The world may change my whole life through
But nothing's gonna change my love for you

If the road ahead is not so easy
~ Our love will lead the way for us ~
Like a guiding star

I'll be there for you if you should need me
You don't have to change a thing
~ I love you just the way you are ~

So come with me and share the view
I'll help you see forever too
Hold me now, touch me now
I don't want to live without you

~ Nothing's gonna change my love for you ~
You ought to know by now how much I love you
One thing you can be sure of
I'll never ask for more than your love

Nothing's gonna change my love for you
You ought to know by now how much I love you
The world may change my whole life through
But nothing's gonna change my love for...

Nothing's gonna change my love for you
You ought to know by now how much I love you
One thing you can be sure of
I'll never ask for more than your love

Nothing's gonna change my love for you
You ought to know by now how much I love you
The world may change my whole life through
But nothing's gonna change my love for you

Blogwatch: "Doubt" (All Men are Liars)

Sam de Brito posted an interesting entry a few days back re commitment in relationships. He ended it with:

"Doubts are natural. Commitment to see past them is what matters."

I just wonder how applicable this belief is to a late-teens/early-twenties relationship.

I think it's true that one has to work for a relationship. It would be naive to think that you would be able to find the perfect partner and everything will automatically click into place. You have to work over differences and compromise.

So I suppose the idea is, if the doubts are just niggling thoughts, then one should really just man up and face the difficulties.

But what about for younger relationships? At an age before permanently settling down is in mind, is it such a shame to let it go if things aren't naturally spic-span perfect?

I've been told that youth is the perfect opportunity to try things out, to experience life and to just have as much fun as possible. It is really that important, then, to hold on to something you have doubt for?

Yet there are two sides to every argument.

Youth can be an opportunity to learn about commitment, to practise the art of compromise and to rehearse life-after-vows.

Relationships are fascinating things. Success requires not just a coincidence of hearts, but of mentality and values. At the end of the day, it depends on the weight you place on the relationship, as opposed to what you may gain without it.

It depends on whether you're willing to create that coincidence, or whether you're happy to just let it go.

An opportunity to shine

In Hong Kong's music industry, those people you see/hear regularly directing vocal sounds into a microphone can be divided into two categories: singers and idols.

I've always enjoyed listening to Ella Koon's songs. However, she was always put in the "idols" basket, and that's how I viewed her. The focus was often her romances, her looks and her sex appeal, while her singing was disregarded.

It took a chance occurrence for the public to recognise Ella's musical abilities. A contestant of the amateur singing competition 超級巨聲 invited Ella to sing the duet "Endless Love" with him.

It's difficult to say whether or not it was a good choice of partner. Ella totally stole the show. Ella's strong voice is more suited to the likes of "Endless Love", rather than the Cantopop songs she usually sings. Mark Lui, speaking as one of the judges, commented more on Ella's singing than the contestant's.

From the moment that competition aired, the public suddenly recognised Ella's talent, and re-categorised her as a singer. It may have seemed beforehand like an . Because Ella had been working on her singing, despite it being disregarded, this seemingly insignificant 3-minute performance may well be the turning point of her career.

Opportunities arise in small things here and there, and we may not always recognise them for what they are. It is only if we are always prepared for them that we can grab hold and make use of them.

It may seem like I'm jumping on the bandwagon, but I'm glad that Ella is being recognised for what she can do.

The Powerpuff Girls!

For some reason, my childhood love for the Powerpuff Girls has been reignited. Unfortunately, I have very little recollection of the episodes. In the past week or so, I have resorted to watching the entire series again on youtube.

By far my favourite of the girls is Bubbles. She's so cute and innocent, yet can be tough when the occasion calls for it.


Rather coincidentally, I roam the university in a group of 3 girls. The other day, we were bored in class and decided to each adopt one of the Powerpuff Girls as ourselves.

Before leaving the classroom, I decided to leave our mark on the whiteboard.


Pity I didn't have all the appropriate colours.

A dash of colour

One of my favourite types of flowers would have to be the calla lily. I have a few white ones growing in the garden, and I admire them for their elegance and air of sophistication.

The other day, I was gazing out at the flowers and I noticed a dash of red in the white petal one lily flower.


My first thought was that the flower was bleeding.

Upon closer inspection, however, it was revealed that a rose petal from the neighbouring plant had fallen into it.



And so, by chance, a beautiful dash of vibrancy was added to the grace of the calla.

Jealousy

Jealousy is a funny thing. It's the source of many a dispute between couples, and justifies (at least to one party) the most ludicrous of accusations. So how far you have to go to reach the realms of unreasonable jealousy?

Thinking back to times when I've felt this green emotion wash over me, I realise that it often is pretty ridiculous. There are those times where it may be understandable that I felt jealous, but my mind would scold myself for being overly possessive. In some cases, it is totally unjustified, such that it is embarrassing to even recall.

I have to confess to feeling uneasy about my boyfriend's previous relationships. I suppose that is not uncommon, which is why people are often advised not to mention their exes to their partner. But from a rational perspective, why should there be any discomfort if you truly believe they're over and done with?

Perhaps there's an element of competition, a pressure to at least live up to their standards.

I do recall a particularly ridiculous incident. There is a girl whom I've always been weary about, even though she was never in a relationship with my boyfriend. She wasn't totally unrelated, but it definitely wasn't enough to justify jealousy. Once, I was in class with her and she pulled out her phone. I thought it was the same model as my boyfriend's new phone, and this feeling of unease crept through me.

I later realised it wasn't the same model after all, but that's besides the point. Whatever the model of the phone, it certainly did not warrant jealousy. I remember telling myself off (in my head, of course) for being silly, and soon managed to stamp out the feeling. What bothers me, though, is that the feeling got there in the first place.

Perhaps I'm a lot more possessive than I'd like to admit.

Dramaroll: "The Greatness of a Hero"

Having run out of new drama episodes for the midsem break, I decided to dig out the dramas I had put aside earlier in the year.

My search led me to warehoused drama <<盛世仁傑>>, which I had given up on after several episodes. However, a few people have recommended it to me, and so I thought I might give it a second chance.

It didn't disappoint (aside from the fact that it only relieved my boredom for two days). The most interesting thing was the chemistry between Kent Cheng and Sonija Kwok. From a purely physical perspective, I could never have imagined Kent to be an appropriate match for the most beautiful Miss Hong Kong (in my opinion, of course).

Here be Sonjia:


And here be Kent:


Yet despite the physical incompatibility and the age gap, their characters 狄仁傑 and 曹月 were by far the most convincing and touching couple of the entire series.

I love it when something non-generic springs from TVB.

Playlist: <<多謝失戀>> Twins

回頭是場空 大地回冬 初分手數天 總會痛
仍然在途中 ~ 只好相信 雨過後有彩紅 ~

曾落空 先知我 因為愛 曾經多英勇
曾為愛上你面紅 夠我閉上大門 在慶功

全靠當天喜歡過錯的人 今天先會自我解窘
~ 明白小小的失戀不害人 更加添我成熟感 ~
無法一起都總算愛過些人 借過你體溫 練習擁吻
留下你合照細望 才知道 我跟他人更合襯

從前學年中 自命情種 ~ 一出手 愛得比較重 ~
來年換時空 應該長進 再愛定更松容

曾撞板 先知我 因為愛 曾經多失控
回望過去也面紅 愛上你似漫遊 外太空

全靠當天喜歡過錯的人 今天先會自我解窘
明白小小的失戀不害人 更加添我成熟感
無法一起都總算愛過些人 ~ 借過你體溫 練習擁吻 ~
留下你合照細望 才知道 我跟他人更合襯

全靠當天喜歡過錯的人 今天先會自我解窘
~ 無論初戀多麼的感動人 更好的愛前面等 ~
無法一起都總算愛過些人 借過你體溫 練習擁吻
明白要讓我這樣年輕過 至懂得誰最合襯

---

~ I can only believe that a rainbow follows the rain ~

~ Understanding that a small break up is harmless - it just makes me more mature ~

~ Once I loved, I loved too deeply ~

~ Borrowed the warmth of your body for practice ~

~ No matter how touching the first love is, a better one awaits ahead ~

---

I'm not sure whether living by a Twins song is all that advisable, but the attitude seems a healthy one.

Perhaps the perfect teenage gospel.

Ed Westwick's British accent!

By far my favourite non-Asian onscreen male is Gossip Girl's Chuck Bass, played by British actor Ed Westwick.


His charisma just oozes off the screen to melt all my insides.

Before today, I had only ever heard him speak in an American accent on the show. But a bit of browsing has revealed to me his sexy British speak in an interview with his girlfriend, Jessica Szohr.

How can you not love him?

Playlist: "Hopelessly Devoted to You" Olivia Newton John

Guess mine is not the first heart broken
My eyes are not the first to cry
I'm not the first to know
There's just no gettin' over you

Hello, I'm just a fool who's willing
To sit around and wait for you
But baby can't you see
There's nothin' else for me to do

~ I'm hopelessly devoted to you ~

But now there's nowhere to hide
Since you pushed my love aside
I'm out of my head
Hopelessly devoted to you
Hopelessly devoted to you
Hopelessly devoted to you

My head is saying, "Fool, forget him"
My heart is saying, "Don't let go"
Hold on to the end
That's what I intend to do

I'm hopelessly devoted to you

But now there's nowhere to hide
Since you pushed my love aside
I'm out in my head
Hopelessly devoted to you
Hopelessly devoted to you
Hopelessly devoted to you

A happy meal

Today, I bought my first McDonald's Happy Meal for a long while in the hope that it would make me happier.

It didn't quite work.

However, I was pleasantly surprised when I found my favourite Powerpuff Girl amongst my small fries.


It's been so long that I had forgotten Happy Meals came with a toy.

The race of friendship

I recently had a friend ask me if I minded the fact that he had seemingly usurped my place in my group of friends, i.e. he was becoming even closer to them that I was. I shrugged off the issue when he brought it up.

Upon reflection, however, it does seem like something worth thinking through.

I remember a rather awkward confrontation I had with another girl in Year 6. She had just transferred from another school, to find that I had best-befriended her (ex)best-friend. She oh-so-graciously forgave my ignorance about their previous relationship, but demanded that I let them sit next to each other from that day onwards.

Quite taken back, I remember apologising and appeasing her. Afterwards, though, it struck me what a ridiculous request she was making.

Friendships aren't about who gets there first - there's no "first in, first served" policy. Bonds develop quite naturally between people, and factors like personalities, circumstances and experiences will determine how strong these ties are.

Perhaps, if I had quicker reflexes, I would've kindly denied that Year 6 girl her wish. I would've explained to her that friendship is non-transferable. Even if I had wanted to fulfil her desires, there was nothing I could do to restore their best-friendship.

In today's scenario, I'm playing the opposite role, but the same attitude should apply. Friendships develop and change - it's quite inevitable.

If the developments bother me, I should be striving to improve the situation myself. Am I not spending enough time with my friends? Maybe I'm not paying enough attention to what they're up to. Or perhaps we've each moved on to a different stage of our respective lives. Whatever it may be, no one else should have to give way for me to "retain my position".

Does this mentality apply to romantic relationships? Perhaps that's a thought for another day.

Inertia

My sense of inertia is very strong. I don't mean to comment about my physical mass. I simply mean that I am quite opposed to change. I seem to prefer to stick with the status quo, no matter what the alternative may be.

Perhaps it comes down to being extremely risk averse. I'm afraid of uncertainty - it feels so insecure.

The feeling of regret is also one I strive to avoid. You may ask, wouldn't you regret it if you didn't take the chance to try something new? Well, I can never be sure of what that would've been like. I'm more likely to regret and act than an omission.

The problem with this attitude is that I don't get anywhere. Quite obviously, improvement springs from change. If I continue to bide as I am now, I may not get worse off, but neither will I be better off.

Perhaps it would be advisable to start making careful changes, to take calculated risk. But it's so easy to just stand idle - to just watch life march past you, rather than walk it yourself.

Some things are just easier said than done.

Unintentional imitation

Dayo's 麥提爽 in <<絕代商驕>> wore this exact same outfit practically the whole way through.


A few days ago, I seem to have found the female version of that in my wardrobe.


I never thought there'd be a day I would go out dressed up as a TV character.

Santa Cullen

The product of a boring stats lecture:


They say necessity is the mother of invention. Here is an example of creativity springing from mistake.

In the previous times I've connected the dots (no, this wasn't my first bored lecture), I've never thought to deface the picture. By accidentally joining 46 with 47, though, I had no choice but to add a personal touch to salvage the piece of art.

One thing led to another, until the fully-developed figure was shown to one Jem, who affectionately dubbed him "Santa Cullen".

The resilience of love

At lunch today, I gave my latte the usual swirl with the spoon, mercilessly destroying any pattern on the foam, before sipping away.

I was halfway through drinking when I noticed that the heart shape was still visible on the surface of the foam!


I continued drinking, though by this stage I admit I was actively trying to preserve the heart.


And preserve it I did, even after all the liquid had disappeared down my belly.

A sign of the resilience of love, perhaps?

Horsies!

I was walking out of Merewether when I saw two horsies trotting along Butlin Ave!


I ran up towards them to take a photo. Luckily, they stopped at the lights, or else I wouldn't have been able to catch up.


Not the best quality photos, I know. But I felt kinda weird taking a picture like a tourist on uni grounds.

Later, on the City Rd Footbridge, I caught sight of the two horsies' butts swaying off into the thickets of Victoria Park.

A nice touch to the busy city streets, they were.

Objective v Subjective [2009] 1 TPS 1

Judgments in criminal law have a load of principles and reasoning behind them. However, there are some which really leave you to question the adequacy of our legal system.

An overriding issue in class discussion seems to be whether the law uses an objective or subjective test to determine whether an accused is criminally liable.

A recent addition to my knowledge of criminal law is that, to establish manslaughter by criminal negligence, the accused's intellectual capacity is not taken into account when establishing breach of duty of care. The standard is of a person of normal fortitude.

This principle was at play in Stone and Dobinson [1977] QB 354. Stone and Dobinson, both men of below average intelligence, lived with Stone's grown-up sister Fanny and provided her with food. Unfortunately, Fanny appeared to have an eating disorder, but neither men had the aptitude to respond appropriately. Fanny died from the disorder, and the men were held liable for manslaughter.

The fact that the men did not have the intellectual capacity to act as required was irrelevant, because the objective test was to be applied for this offence.

But why? What is the justification of convicting Stone and Dobinson? This isn't civil law, where some sort of compensation is sought for another party. Criminal law operates to punish those who have committed culpable wrongs, or to deter recurrence of the unlawful act. This conviction does neither.

Surely there can be a mechanism by which this issue can be overcome.

To love or be loved?

This question often pops up: in dramas, in personality tests, in my mind. Would it be better to be with someone you love? Or one who loves you?

The optimal, of course, would be that both parties rate similarly on each other's love-o-meter. But you can't always have the best of both worlds. What if you had to choose one?

To just have him love you wouldn't be too bad. He'd dote on you and make you the centre of attention. Chances are, you'll get your way most of the time.

On the other hand, if you were with the one you loved, you can be satisfied that you're with whom you deem to be the best. Perhaps just being with him is worth the lack of affection.

Faced with the two, I'd probably choose the one who loved me. However, I'd spend so much time thinking about the one I loved, that I probably wouldn't be able to enjoy the attention and devotion anyway.

All in all, it wouldn't be unreasonable to conclude that if the feelings are going down a one-way street, then there shouldn't be a relationship in the first place.

Perhaps, in this context, there's no room for a grab-what-you've-got-till-you-can-find-something-better attitude.

Nature's art

Mum is a fan of gardening, and is quite gifted at this art. This is one of her works which she has decided to showcase indoors.


Yes, please conveniently overlook the slightly browned edges of some leaves.

Anyway, that's not the point.

I was amazed when I looked closely at the leaves, in particular, its blend of colours. A strip of light green runs through the centre, as though someone had taken a paintbrush and nonchalantly given it a sweep.


You can measure how successful a fake is by how closely it resembles the real thing. Yet an indication of a real object's perfection is how synthetic it actually looks.

Ironic, but beautifully so.